HomesickEric

01:16 am of 30 th of August. I’m outside of the house, smoking, watching the illumination of the moon and listening to my current favourite song, Inside of me by Taru. Found out about this song from the Running man 106 th shows. Thanks to my sister for downloading it since I don’t have the mood to watch one last holiday (though I think I should have watched it with them last week). I can’t find the lyric but I’m sure she’s singing this in English... The accent is too hard to be understood but I’ll manage the words. I made a decision (not just precise yet) that I’ll not be home today. I should have given myself more time to think about going back when I was just there 4 days ago. I’m dying really of going back, I do... but I think going back is just another chance for me to sum up my homesickness. Maybe next 16 th of September? Just a thought but I plan to go back home that date whether the family fiesta is going to happen or not. So there’s still another 2 weeks (and 1 week has ...

It’s the 27 th of August 2012 and I haven’t called it a day yet. I’ve got so many things to do but they mixed up too much resulting a mess in this brain of mine. I just can’t figure out which should I start first or maybe I just can get the mood to start anything just yet. Listening to the BEP’s Apl song and there’s a slight feeling of homesickness I’m having deep down here. It’s not that I haven’t been home too long but I still can feel the mood in there. Called my mother and it didn’t satisfy me. I need to see her face when I’m talking to her. Been thankful enough mobile phone was invented but still it can’t be compared to when it comes to real talking. The moon is bright somehow. I can barely see it but I know it’s bright - the clouds told me so. Couldn’t see it back at home as it rained too much back there. I just missed it I know. Next time don’t mess shits up. I was thinking if I were to be at home right now, maybe I will still be playing with Bopy or even watching my cats sle...

Yeah that should do the post. I don't have any mood now either to teach or to text anyone.. I texted too much last holiday and my thumb now hurts. This I think, was such a waste of time. I should have appreciated the precious moments last week not wasting them by just sleeping and doing shits I could barely remember. I need time (which I always say this) to stay calm and accept the reality I'm having now. Arrived safely at Kunak last 4 am and slept just then. I'm in the teacher's office right now listening to all the other veterans talking this and that to each other. The day went too fast I could still remember what I did yesterday at this exact moment. BTW, my friend is planning to come back to her homeland this Friday and I'm in doubt whether I should join her or not. Last time she took only 4 hours and a few minutes before we arrived my town and that scared the hell outta me. Looking from the bright side, I should be thankful she didn't waste much of my time...

Hello, It's 1 something AM now and I can't get back to sleep. Thinking that I'll be home next Friday has made me so excited I can't even sleep (barely). Although today was a tiring bastard one for me, I still manage to do the best for my kids. I didn't expect much for my practical (as usual) because when it comes to teaching, all I can think about is how well can my kids get something from me. I need them to learn something, not just because I need a better grade for my course - that's totally out of my thoughts. I've been observed today and it went well. I like my guiding lecturer. She's one of a kind. I learned a lot from her today and I like that. She's too kind to share her ideas (instead of criticizing my teaching). I like it when I get something new to learn for my day: I still need to understand the world better. Now what amazed me today was the one time I've been asked to settle down 2 kids fighting with each other. I blurred for once the...

Ahoy ahoy... Tamat sesi persekolahan untuk hari ini and it doesn't seem to satisfy me. I have to be observed tomorrow and all I can think of now is how I've outburst my wrath to the kids. They became silent soon after I've turned into Hulk and it sadden me. I'm so much in regret right now. I didn't mean to scare them. It's just that... my patience has came into its limit and suddenly that. They're just kids of course they want to have fun. I have to loosen up a little! This is so wrong! Dan akhirnya saya sudah mewartakan masalah saya kepada puan penyelia petang. Beliau hanya berdiam diri... Saya x peduli la apa laporan yang dia akan bagi sama my authorities but I've given my best to this school, especially for the kids. This phase of practical has been too overwhelming for me. That's all... I'm waiting for holidays...

I don't actually believe in prediction but I think it's one of the best hilarious game. I'm into this site since last January and I saved some of the reading made. Just in case I have to read it again at the end of the year. It really does right and sometimes yeahs me. Anyway, clicked my numerology reading and here's the result: Eric, Your Personal Life Path Number is 4 "What is a Life Path number?" If ever there was a moment of total transformation Eric, it was the moment of your birth. In that instant, you stepped through a door in time into a new reality -- the reality of human life. The most important number in your numerology chart is based on the date of your birth, the moment when the curtain goes up in your life. Even at that moment, you were a person with your own unique character, as unique as your DNA. Everything that is you existed in potential, much like a play that is about to begin. Your entire life exists as a potential that has been prepar...

12:17 AM of 08 August 2012 Greeting brethrens, I don’t know what I have to do now so I used the time to blog. Didn’t really have much to say for I treasured the day with all efforts I have. I’m watching the moon and didn’t take account of its phase. It’s still bright though. I wanted to talk how I was treated by my authorities but let just say those are so negative I hate to write it so much. I didn’t care how much am I supposed to having followers or even readers because I wrote about myself too much. I just don’t want to judge people often. Remember my attitude is based on how people treat me. There is so much thing (or people) to complain about but I just don’t want them to interfere with my life. They are no important in my journey and I consider them an obstacle (this is rude but it’s the truth). Now my kids are having a class with me tomorrow and I haven’t prepared my plan. Still it’s the month of fasting and all I can think about is a boring activity having them to sit down ...

9.50 pm of 6 August 2012 I’ve just woke up and now starting to feel like I need holiday very much. It’s been 6 weeks since I last saw my home and now I’m feeling like I need that feel again. I long for my rest very much. These recent practicum days have been so tiring and I almost lose my senses. I need to calm down and forget all these. I need rest. Somehow I’ve forgotten the moon. I promised to watch it when it comes to the last of this year’s July but I didn’t keep it. Been there for a few minutes and now I’m starting to regret it. I have class tomorrow but it’s the month of fasting and I can’t plan anything right. I fast too of course but not that I want to: I have to. The environment of the house made me so and of course I’m a little glad about it (somehow it saved me from being more busy in the evening). My classes are boring and I can sense it myself. I have to limit my activities and now I have no much idea for interesting learning lessons. I didn’t get that enthusiasms much ...

I will not forget this day from my entire life. Something big happened to me last night and it made me realized how precious life is. Now I have to thank God for his gracious gift of lives for me. I still need to see my family; I love them too much that they are the only person I could remember that time. I miss home and there’s still 3 more weeks to hold on tight. I’ve been too busy recently I barely have time to call my mother. That’s regret. I just don’t want to burden them with all my stress. All I can think of now is to live this life to the fullest for this is my second chance. Thank God.