HomesickEric

Wow I can now mention people in my blog literary referencing to them by just a click. That's new for an active Google user since no one knows the existence of Google + yet. Not the case anyway. I'm thinking about buying myself a gift for what have I done with my examination's result and of course Christmas is about to begin in a few more hours. It's fun and motivating me for another year round in Tawau. I'm thinking about buying a new wrist watch. Mine currently has broken ( in battery and also a problem with its belt ). 4 enough reasons for me to buy a new wrist watch. I'm thinking about getting myself to be old-fashioned again. Plus, it gives me more confidence and also comfort. Buying metal bracelet kind of watch was a disaster. I'm sticking with traditional standard tang-buckle strap... This previous post will still count though. 

I'm thinking about going to the town tomorrow. Since my sister is not around, I think I'll be wandering alone. I need to buy a few things for the next big occasion - but still I can't figure that out. My buying list won't usually work  if it comes to buying things.  I hope this little book of mine will help. My bachelor night has already been succeeded and there's a lot to think about for my future - needed to be reconstructed again. My life has been changed lately and I'm open to embrace the new world.  Little note book Now that I'm away with these two little mugs I missed them so much. Wondering why I've been using such a strange straw? Well let's just not focus unto that. LOL, It's memorable and just by looking at this picture can make me smile. How can I ever forget them.  My medication as shown above has came to its end. It's a shame that I've been suffering  Streptococcal pharyngitis  at the wrong time ...

I don't know who writes this but it's a need to answer before putting yourself into a really committed relationship. Don't get me wrong. I share this because it's a point to ponder to ask ourselves whether we're ready or not... The questions are typical ( so much for a skeptical ). Note that the questions would include us with our religion. Not enough information to state its source but they're reliable.  PRE-ENGAGEMENT QUESTIONS _____________________________________________________________ Every couple should ask these before considering engagement to be married. Take some time out to really ponder them properly… Questions about compatibility • Is there a spark between you: o Physically? o Intellectually? o Emotionally? o Spiritually? o In terms of having fun together? • What are the things you have in common? • Are you best friends? • Do you disagree on any of these key issues: o What you want to do with your lives. o W...

I don’t know if I’m in the right position to talk about anyone else’s relationship. I’m a pretty good analyzer but still I defy judgments in my life. It’s not comfortable to know one based on our keen observations and keep them to ourselves so this stereotypical view is kept secret or unless dramas will follow later. We all have different ways managing our relationship. There are the existences of types of that thing and I’m practically pointing my fingers on yours (because I have mine too). Please do not judge me, I’m just writing this based on my experience (and sharing won’t be a burden). I’m not telling you how to run your relationship, I pretty much would like to know your stories. But let’s just say I’m the narrator now. Now firstly, the only thing I remember from starting serious relationship in our life is to know what you and your significant other need. There’s a lot to argue to find the key of happiness and if we aren't dare enough to face that then be prepare...

I'm bored... It's holiday and I'm bored... This is the first time I've been reminiscing about a week I have ( too much ) in which I actually won't care like before. I practically don't have much to do now since my sister is not around and there's nothing much to plan without all the family members here together. This is probably one of the most relaxing holidays I have ever had in my life. Thinking that next week should be important, I hope I'm not exactly putting all my expectation unto that days that I have lack passion of enjoying times like this right now. I don't expect anything for my Christmas ( least is I've been feeling completed enough recently ). There's no more to need if I've found what I've been long for. Next is to wait for my sister and do shopping stuffs with her.

Well hello there, just in case I never updated anything, I’m busy preparing for the next Christmas celebration. I’m still missing my previous week’s holiday events but I’ve promised my friend that I’ll be writing this down. Since we still have another year round to be a finale for my 5 seasons of life back down, we went out having ourselves treated by a nice farewell part. It was me, Sham, Sandro, Elvy and Kak Liza whom accompanied me buying bus ticket and stuffs. The nice dinner was a blast and we ate until it’s too late to puke. LOL I can’t actually write the whole things in detail. Pictures will follow later. Anyway, the dishes were fine (although there were not a lot of them to choose). They were what we called steamboat (because not everything has to be steamed and I don’t really know where boat comes from). Sham has always been dreaming about having this thing so we planned it earlier (including who’s going to come with us). It’s not that we didn’t want certain people to come a...

I have jealousy yes I do. I'm managing it and the only way to cope with shits like this is to keep everything down low. No one likes me when I get jealous because I'll eventually turn into a 100%ly crappy irrational bastard. Well at least I said that... I have the interest to stalk you; your profile, your daily events.. your everything... but seeing someone flirting on you? Hell that's a torture... and even worse if you're playing that game along. How am I suppose to feel when I saw that? ( and this is the second time I've posted something like this after one 3 years earlier )... Can flirting be accepted in my relationship? NO! Am I mad right now? Hell yeah! I'm so sorry I've decided to 'feel uninterested' to stalk your profile but I just hate dramas and stuffs. I hate myself when I get jealous and probably you should too. I don't want to put you in my shoes cause I know how does it feel to be 'seemingly' betrayed with words and utteranc...

Can't help but to listen this song overly repeated. I like how much it conveys its meaning. I wish I could sing this but let just say I don't have much voice of a singer. Here's the lyric anyway: Santana: There are worse things I could do Than go with a boy or two Even though the neighborhood thinks I'm trashy And no good  I suppose it could be true But there are worse things I could do. Cassandra:  I could flirt with all the guys  Smile at them and bat my eyes Press against them when we dance  Make them think they stand a chance  Then refuse to see it through  That's a thing I'd never do  Santana:  I could stay home every night  Wait around for Mr. Right  Take cold showers every day  Wade:  And throw my life away  On a dream that won't come true  Cassandra:  I could hurt someone like me  Out of spite or jealousy  Wade: I don't ste...

Ehem, I don't have much to write about.. It's holiday and I'm enjoying every seconds of it.   Went to church today and another event will be coming up. This holiday is going to be the busiest I guess despite I have a very big reason why I'm having my break... hehehehe Anyway, I shall be posting serious stuffs today.. I've been spending all my nights talking to a phone for nearly about 2 - 3 hours daily just because I miss someone very much. Not to mention a name but I really look forward to the day we'll be meeting. That's the greatest event I'm waiting with such this stomach of mine full of butterflies LOL My financial problem is surely killing me softly right now that's the one reason I'm hesitating my plans. Plus, my family is going to move into a new place ( this would be the 5th time ) and my days ahead are getting more confusing - that includes every plans we have for the next month. Sigh~ Have you noticed I've changed my templa...

Here's the final deal. I'm revising for my last paper and won't be holding unto my notes much longer. I'm so uncomfortable with my situations now and I'm not in a good mood ( practically no mood to talk or even do anything ). I'm so devastated and pathetic ( yet that's the one thing making me strong ). I met God tonight after missing him so much for the rest of the weeks. I'm tired... tired of studying for my degree when all of my friends have already gotten their degree and I'm still stuck here. This angst of mine has become really negative and now I need something to grip. Being not in a good mood means I'll take every little shits seriously that's why people will always say I'm a bit sensitive. This is normal. I'm glad I'm being normal but somehow I don't want to hurt others just because I've burst my sarcasm out loud. I'm beginning to talk like a cow right now (realized that!). Well anyway I'll be starting...

Clearly I haven't been brainwashed yet. I almost believed your words when you failed to do it. That's why I should have told you long ago not to promise or state something you're not capable of doing so. And so this night I'm missing you too much it hurts... and this anxious feeling I have about you, it sums up. I tried convincing myself not to be so subjective but I'm just worried if I keep doing the same stupid mistake. I put my trust on you too much I'm afraid I'll be a foolish person hereafter. Please convince me!

The fact that I'm suffering headache is so killing me now. I didn't actually remember anything today ( though I've  sit my first paper: English Teaching Methodology For Younger Learners ). I've been striving too much my body can't handle shits. I'm looking forward to my holidays but my next paper is coming up so better put all my attention towards that. My influenza is at its peak ( I don't say? )... Haven't felt better since the past few weeks and now this fever is seemingly coming. Barely fighting with myself! Now the moon is actually very bright tonight. Some say it's the Hunter's moon and also others called it Harvest moon ( I don't actually know why ) but I just love how right it is. It's killing me to barely gaze it from here and the most killing part is knowing that there's only 1 full moon phase for my next holiday ( Only be willing to approve the November's ). Crap! Enjoying shits like this should be better felt if...

Oh jadi sekarang ko marah sebab saya tidak wish you for your birthday? You didn't even wish mine last March why do I have to bother now? I decided to move on without you jadi I am the one who supposed to storm out. This isn't my fault and you're now too late! P/s: Fairly fantasizing about this. 

Waiting for a cup of tea before I start revising this early morning. I've spent almost all my day sleeping and doing nothing I rather be concentrating on my paper next Monday. BTW, I watched VHS they said the scariest movie ever. It was fine. I don't believe in ghost so I treasure every ghost movies as if I can sense the feeling of being scared and all that eerie shits. Now VHS was creepy that I should say. It freaked the hell out of me and some scenes were just too gross. I like it though. Just the one of a white man's movie I found out real creepy. Bravo! and just to mention, it wasn't that scary (brag and bragging).    

Listening to Taru's inside of me once again never failed to make me missed my practicum days so much. I have always spent my night on the veranda either smoking, drinking beverages I made for the night or even calling home and my ehem ehem (though I have little bit of a relationship problem right now). I missed my kids... Not just because I treat them like my own children but I missed the good old days when I don't have to push myself thinking stuffs that may explode the tip of my head. I'm overwhelmed by the fact that examination is just around the corner - that is why I spent all days and night playing DoTa thinking that this can escape me from the reality. There's this one thing about my hospitality here that I'm not satisfied. We've been asked to move into our old hostel and I was about to enjoy the lasts of the days here in my oldest block. Our institute's administration is so confusing with all lecturers having their own thought and students b...

Listening to Try by Ashley Brook has made me realize that I’m getting closer to the end. My friend said I’m only fond to bluesy and sentimental song and I admitted that: I’m only good in reflecting myself if sad song comes to my hearing (or more to heart). Realizing that I’ve spent almost 4 years of my life here is not that long (I thought) and now I still have this whole year to suffer this would might be a miracle that I can really survive. Now that I have limited time yet I barely plan to enjoy everything left. This is surely a surprise for I’m not that kind of person. I accept being parted with something (or someone) I labeled as a drop in place (posted about this before). I know I’m getting more and more distracted by my life event recently but that wasn’t really a burden. I judged people lesser realizing that I don’t want to be judged. Although some of my friends might think as if my world is revolving around them, I cherish every little bit of my own here. Having another yea...

Good day, Looks like I have only the mood to write something when it comes to great changes in my life. Yes, indeed... Called Telupid District officer yesterday just to ask where would my brother be teaching and eventually realized there would be such a drift in my life.. I mean my family's life. Knowing one of my family is having his own career means we have stepped into a further level on the stairs of life.... This is a leap.. A big leap upon our history and dreams. I've never imagined this thing is going to be faster than I thought. I haven't prepared myself into changes that will surely affect my life. I'm proud of my brother... Not just because he has been sacrificing to much for his youngsters but also with the fact that he has been a perfect role model as an older brother. I never should have try to chase him (in which I don't). He just made me realize that shits we've always dreamed of when we were still kids have not lost its hope. Some people may h...

Hello, next post for today since I've told myself that I have lots of thing to be written down... Just in case someone read this, I enjoyed how much I've been spreading my individualism publicly.. My weeks before were seemingly disastrous... I have to pass up 3 different projects at the same time and still I have 4 more to be finished (which is not mine) for the veteran teachers. I didn't put a lot of my effort to those since I have my brother back at home. He graduated last Monday (I guess) and still I should thank him for helping. We chatted yesterday and he told me his posting is yet to be known today. I shall call home by that (probably by this night). Examination is around the corner and amazingly I've wasted such a lot of my time playing DoTa... I guess I haven't prepared myself for another stressful things just yet. I watched Smash again and noticed a new song I missed to memorize... yeah this is me.. When I'm fond to a music I'll start memoriz...

Good day my dearest readers... I actually have a lot to write about but the sickness of this fingers non-stop typing words since the last few weeks has made me feel irritated.. It feels like suffering Parkinson or stuff... But anyway, I'd like to copy and paste my tarot reading I've made online recently... Although I don't believe this kinda stuff but these are really something.. So here it goes... Card 1  (Justice) :  How you feel about yourself now   » You are feeling that things will go your way, you believe in fairness and justice in all things. If you are considering partnership issues, personal or professional, dealings will go well. Perhaps you are about to sign a contract or legal document, this will be beneficial to you. If someone has done wrong to you it will be put right and you will feel justice has been done. Card 2  (The Emperor) :  What you most want at this moment   » The cards suggest that what you most...

Good day! It's been long since my last post and I'm really looking forward to blogging even though there's no much time to do so. All I'm saying is just... Yesterday we have this event kinda look alike like Running Man but I won't say it so... The challenges are too easy ( I guess ). Everyone were thinking about each and other's safety and that won't be anything much of a challenges... Still, I was called last day by my ex mentor from my previous school.. My two best teacher friends called and were asking about this and that. I miss the school... I miss how much I've spent my time there... and that won't be any problem at all.. I guess I'll be seeing them sooner.. and that should end my post... P/s: I'm glad I was missed.. :P

I saw you for like the whole day yesterday... and I don't actually know what to do. I still have this insecurity of not having you and stuffs so I just happened to have my sit... I'm still amazed we haven't talked much after this whole year... You're just an inspiration! Something that can motivate me living the rest of my days and still you didn't know how much your value is for me. I just can't stand watching you from this distance and you're there being so much like "I don't care".. LOL This is absurd!

Adui kelas ku ni.. Miahahaha although it's been long since I last saw my classmates, I missed them so much I can't even think about a topic to talk to them. Anyway, life is going to be so busy this week... and the week after (I guess). My assignments have to be submitted as soon as possible. Thank God there are only 3 of them I should be passing up but then, all shits just hard to be managed. I haven't unpacked my stuffs I brought back from the rent house and my room is in mess right now. I'm thinking about flunking out.

Murid 1: Cikgu besok cikgu masih ada di sekolah: Cikgu: Iya masih lagi... Murid 2: Cikgu besok kelas terakhir kan dengan kami? Cikgu: Iya besok last (walaupun sebenarnya tiada) Murid 1: Cikgu masuk ya besok... Cikgu: Nanti kamu panggil la cikgu besok k? Murid 2: Iya nanti besok kami panggil juga cikgu... Ada jamuan... Murid 1: Ish kenapa ko bagitau... Cikgu besok jamuan hari raya.. datang ke kelas ya? Cikgu: (buat-buat blurr)... Oh ok nanti kamu panggil cikgu... Terharu juga la saya sampai tu budak-budak buat jamuan untuk saya. Walaupun hari ni saya datang ke sekolah dengan hati yang panas (bad mood la katakan) tapi tidak juga hati ini kesampaian mau marah budak-budak ni. Inio hari ketiga terakhir saya di sini and I'm starting to miss the past 2 months I've been here. I like the teachers (sangat sporting)... I like almost everything about this school... Probably because I'm leaving... Mula-mula datang memang banyak komplen la saya sama ni sekolah tapi last-last t...

Here's a thing of how should you treat me when we declared ourselves being in a relationship. I need to be respected as how I'm treating you now. I don't mind how you see yourself, the most important thing is to have a nice warm heart. Not just to be shared with me but also with other people. You see... treatment is all we cared about being in a serious commitment . I can feel it when you still send me a picture of yourself but then posting it on your Facebook wall? That's degrading my belief on you. It's not special to have a shared picture... and please when you send me one, send an authentic copy of yourself. Don't edit something somewhere. I need a genuinely original face not wanting even a single layer of unwanted colour on it. I want to get to know you well, that's how we decided about that. Be aware that I don't actually demand anything ( it's just that I want the truth ). I'm a simple person. I don't need you to change yourself so tha...

Hello, it's been long since my last post. I just have seldom leisure time nowadays and my entries are getting lesser and lesser. I'm listening to Rio Febrian's song, bukan untukku (after someone said about this song to me)... I love Rio.. I love his songs and I love his voice - not really quite that strong but he has it. My favourite song of him would be: and also... The second song would really mean a lot to me. Decided that it would be a very perfect song for my mood last 2007. I love it because of the blissful lyric - too happy to be understood... and of course the choices they made when it comes to making video clips. Plus, something something which doesn't need to be publicly shared.... LOL. Jenuh is like being bored to someone you love and...yeah you know what I mean. I'm quite fond of the song but the lyric is just too.. what should I say... unattractive?? Anyway, I'll be too busy these recent weeks. I have more assignments to be done and received 3 mor...

The moon recently is so beautiful when I googled the fact that full moon has occurred twice last month ( which is why people called it blue ). Fact that I've been so keen on the phases of the moon is still unknown. Night sky is always so fascinating to me. Here's some pictures I found on the internet. I tried to snap a picture but... yeah you know. A full moon is seen in the sky of Jordanian capital Amman August 31, 2012. (Reuters/Muhammad Hamed) A full moon is seen from Skopje on August 31, 2012. (AFP Photo/Robert Atanasovski) A full moon is seen behind the neon cross of a church in Skopje on August 31, 2012. (AFP Photo/Robert Atanasovski) The Washington Monument, US Capitol and the "Blue" Moon (2nd full moon of the month) are reflected in the newly refurbished Reflecting Pool August 31, 2012 on the National Mall in Washington, DC. (AFP Photo/Karn Bleber) All photos are copied directly from RT News P/s: RIP Neil Armstrong, you made my childhood!